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When I say, I initiated it, I mean that since the introduction came from me, I can be reasonably sure that the exchange is sincere.

Of course, I'm still looking for signs that she is just jumping on an opportunity to get something out of me if she knows I'm interested, but, at least I have some control over the exchange.

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Flirtation can actually be to your advantage if you have trust issues. Being too complimentary etc., is not flirting in my book.In fact, it may not even be clear who exactly initiated a flirt in some cases because you are responding to something that may not be a flirt at all, and continuing the dialog.Who's to say exactly which comment in the exchange was a flirt? So when you say it only works when you initiate contact, I would say you are missing the point because with flirtation it might not be entirely clear who initiated it.I guess for women, they just have to be on the look out for guys that just want sex. First of all, flirting isn't something you might do with only someone you met cold in a bar.But for guys, there are a number of reasons why a woman would want to deceive you -- the main thing to look out for is that she's after money. It applies to people you might already have known for a long time, like the girl at the library desk, the drugstore, a classmate, or someone at work.So in these cases you already know something about them.